A week from today, the politics of Valentine’s Day shall be upon us, and I’d like to give advance warning of war to all parties concerned. Valentine’s Day is a fairly recent import to our society but Kampalans are not to be left behind, so here we are, Halloween, Guy Fawkes Day and all.

This week, in homes, offices and bars all across Kampala, people will be having the same old argument: If I love you every day, why should I feel inclined to make a display of it on one particular day? The men mostly believe their daily expressions of love have been so extraordinary that the women should be overwhelmed and probably swooning on the streets every day. The women have been waiting till this week to subtly let the men know that they are not nearly romantic enough. So while the men ask: why should I, the women ask: why not? What is wrong with having both the daily love and the extra special love?

If indeed you are a gentleman given to doing grand romantic gestures on a daily basis, then you may be excused from the madness. However, one may also argue that if you are used to doing romantic things every day, why stop on this particular day? How come we do not hear about the fact that you love your mother everyday and therefore shall refuse to wish her a happy Mother’s Day?

A lot of the resistance comes from folk who are out of ideas and too afraid to confront the vacuum in their minds. Coming up with unique and appropriate romance which suits your wallet and your partner’s expectations can be a daunting task. However, less is generally more, which is why the old flowers chocolate and dinner routine rarely fails. Also, in the spirit of commercialising everything, there are businesspeople offering to do the thinking for you.

In the end, there isn’t a soul, male or female, who does not like being appreciated. If you know that showing interest on one silly day of the year will make a difference, why must you fight it and give your partner something to resent you about? Relationships are about compromise and knowing what is important to your partner, and if you scratch their back, you eventually get yours scratched too.

Politics dictate that this may either be taken as a massive hint to whom it may concern to do something grand for me next Sunday. Or it may be taken as a challenge to totally ignore me and see what I will do. All I can say is by this time next week, I should have a story to tell. Enjoy the build up to the madness.

Published on Sunday February 7, 2010